Everything you need to know about the Oscars in case you missed them

1. Jennifer Lawrence is a flawless human being.
First there was Jesus. Then Beyoncé. Now we have Jennifer Lawrence. Sure she fell on her way up to accept her best actress Oscar (at age twenty-freaking-two), but whatever. She looked beautiful, and she fell just to remind us that she is a human and we aren't so different, us and her. She also made these sixteen faces throughout the night.

What. A. Boss.

Then, after winning best actress, she took a shot and answered questions for the press. This was the incredibly awesome result.

And finally, in case you aren't totally convinced, just see what happened when Jack Nicholson totally fangirled out over J-Law.

2. Seth MacFarlane was sort of funny, but mostly just sexist.
We knew going into the evening, that the Family Guy creator would likely be offensive, and definitely a little edgier in terms of his comedy. But to what degree? Well, instead of targeting certain celebs directly, MacFarlane seemed to target whole groups in his jokes, but what ended up happening was just kind of a vague sense of sexism and racism and homophobia in his stint as host. For example: his boobs song in the show's first five minutes:

In a place that has only recognized a woman as best director once in its 85 year history, sexist jokes might not have been the best route to take to score laughs, but who am I to say? I wasn't asked to host... yet.

3. Adele was as perfect as you thought she'd be

She won the "Best Original Song" Oscar for "Skyfall." Also, she has a last name and it's Adkins. Whaddyaknow...

4. The presenters were more fun to watch than the winners

For example:

- Renee Zellweger couldn't see or read the envelope. TWICE

- Meryl Streep is so badass that she didn't even open the envelope to announce Daniel Day Lewis as best actor

- Google Sandra Bullock Oscar envelope. Right now. Do it.

Let me know if you have any other questions. But you probably won't. Those are all the highlights.